Wazoo Adventure

Rantburg in all its glory– look fast, their links go away in a hurry:


The truth about drones

My goodness.

[Dawn] Drones are unmanned aircrafts. They are called unmanned because they are actually manned by women. So one can say drones are women-manned aircrafts. This is done to insult the conservative sensibilities of our brothers in the tribal areas where, of course, there are no women.

The first drone attack to take place in Pakistain was actually in 1024AD. It was fired by a Rajput stooge of the Jews on the army of Mahmud Ghaznavi who was liberating the Somnath temple from idols. He took away some gold as well which he duly distributed among the poor in what today is Dubai.

The first Pak to be hit by a drone was actually an innocent camel in North Wazoo. This made him very angry and as a result, he began to behave like a rampaging Tyrannosaurus Rex.

Drones were invented by the famous Jewish scientist, Albert Einstein when his equation, E=mc2, was successfully challenged and debunked by the famous Musselmen physicist, Oreo Maqbool Biscuit in his equally famous book, ‘War and Peace’, co-written with nuclear scientist, alchemist and judo expert, Zaid Hamid in 1941.

When asked how a drone attack was possible in 1024AD, Oreo said it was a case of time travel. This, he said, was achieved when the reptilian Elders of Zion discovered a wormhole near Jerusalem that distorted the space-time continuum in the region and made the camels of that area very angry and krazed killer. Thus, the invention of drones. He insists that he be given a Nobel Prize for this discovery.

Ever since 1024AD, drones have killed over three billion Paks. It is strange how not a single non-Musselmen Pak has ever been killed by a drone. So, to balance things out, the angry camels began to kill Christians. It was only fair.

Compared to the 3bn Pak Musselmens killed by the drones, only 14 Paks have been killed in suicide kabooms by the angry camels. Such attacks are not at all common in Pakistain. In fact, the first ever suicide attack in the country took place only last Sunday and that too only because Pakistain is a country full of sinners and bad Musselmens.

It just gets better…